Friday, March 16, 2012

Never Standing Alone

Bosnia "You are so brave to have done that!"  I kept hearing those words when I got back to the States.  But I didn't feel brave.  I took a little break from college and served as a refugee relief worker with a missions agency over in eastern Europe while fighting in Bosnia and Kossovo was still going on.  I lived in Austria, and travelled into an area where Serbia, Croatia and Bosnia meet.  It was tense but because of the dynamics, little actual fighting happened there, making it a safe place(or at least safe-ish) to take medical supplies and to bring out refugees.

I was only 19 and it was a whole other world to me.  I felt alive some days, confused on others and sometimes I saw things that absolutely broke my heart.  But I never felt particularly brave.  I just felt like I was doing my job, longing to connect with people, and at times I could close my eyes and have the strongest feeling that God was right there with me. My only bravery was following God and going with Him.

Because of that, I tend to see bravery as trusting.  It doesn't come from me; it comes from trusting God to guide my steps even if they go places I wouldn't choose on my own.  Brave to me is living like I know it's not my will that runs my world.   And I cannot do brave on my own.  It's the Holy Spirit that moves me to boldness I would otherwise be lacking.

And even now, I suppose it's brave in a way to stand against some of the norms of the world.   But it's not really brave of me.  It's more God giving me courage, and making me really live.  Praise be to God for those brave places that show life.

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Today I'm writing my heart out for five minutes on Five Minute Fridays.  Unedited and free.  Won't you come join us?


7 comments:

  1. I love what you said - "It's not really brave of me. It's more God giving me courage, and making me really live." That's so true…and sometimes it's so easy to forget it's God and not our own will and ability. Beautiful! (visiting from The Gypsy Mama)

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  2. "And I cannot do brave on my own. It's the Holy Spirit that moves me to boldness I would otherwise be lacking." So true. Yet we forget this truth and boast of our own strength on so many occasions.

    Visiting from Five Minute Friday. Beautiful post. I'll be back for more :)

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  3. Oh, I'm with you on this one. I can't do bravery on my own, but I can trust. I can gut-believe.

    proud of you for listening to God's will at the age of 19, Amy!

    wonderful post!

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  4. "I tend to see bravery as trusting." I think you are so right about this. When Christ hung on the cross, He was living out His trust in His Father. His bravery came from His trust.

    I've always wanted to go to Europe. What a beautiful blessing for you to have experienced being there, in those circumstances, serving with the hands and feet of Christ.

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  5. Hi Amy,

    Hope you're well. Haven't seen you around!

    Blessings,
    Sarah

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    1. Thanks! I've been down for a bit with flu and bronchitis, so I just didn't feel well enough to be online. I'll be back soon, though. Hope you are doing well!

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  6. I love your story, and how you said "My only bravery was following God and going with Him." For some reason, that really speaks to me tonight. Thank you :-)

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